Realisations from 2020
Now the end of 2020 is clearly in sight it's got me thinking about this year. This extraordinary year.
Some people have been focusing on putting one foot in front of the other and haven't been able to see further than the next day.
Others have found that the shift in how they go about daily life has given them a new perspective, it's shone a light on areas that perhaps busyness kept in shadow.
I've had a lot of conversations that have started with 'The past few months have made me realise that…' What these realisations are has varied.
One woman realised she's been continuing in a job that doesn't fulfil her and she wants to start taking steps to follow her true passion.
Another realised that an enforced slower pace has shown her what a stressed-out, no-fun existence she's been living and she wants more from her life and for herself.
It took a lockdown for another woman to realise that when the things she thought were making her feel overwhelmed – work pressure, hectic schedule, family demands, social life – were stripped back she still feels overwhelmed and she wants to figure out what's really going on.
In another conversation a woman told me she's realised that life is too short and too precious for her to continue trying to be what everyone else wants her to be, squeezing herself into a box she doesn't fit and believing that her needs and wants matter less than other people's.
And another woman realised how exhausted she is by her life, and that having a glimpse of what life could be like – how she could feel if she wasn't constantly striving to live up to the expectations set by herself and others – has ignited a desire in her to make changes.
I could go on, the realisations by the women I've been speaking with aren't unique. Maybe you're recognising similarities to how you've been feeling.
While each of these women have their own circumstances, their own experiences, their own challenges, there are some things they all have in common:
- They recognise and acknowledge that they want to feel differently.
- They know there isn't a magic wand that will instantly make life easy.
- They understand they need to make changes, to try something different.
- They don't know what that looks like, they don't know exactly what it is they need to do, yet.
- They're nervous and excited and nervous some more.
- And they're ready to have a go. They're willing to take some new steps forward, even though they can't see the whole staircase (to paraphrase Martin Luther King).
That last point – that's the key.
When we've been living and feeling and being one way for a long time it's incredibly difficult to know exactly what we need to do to change things, as well as actually do the things, all on our own. If it was easy wouldn't you have done it already?!
So that's where you look around to see what or who could help. And that's when the women I describe above, and others like them, come to me.
Each of them have an idea of what I'm like and whether they think I could be of some help to her, from reading these emails, following me on Instagram, listening to the podcast, taking a course or workshop, or being in The Calm Mind Club.
They get in touch and we have a chat on the phone about what's going on with her, how she's feeling, what she's dealing with and what she wants her life to look, feel and be like.
Occasionally it becomes clear that I'm not right for them at this time and if I think that a different kind of support would suit her better I will always say so.
And often, our conversation results in her feeling excited about the possibilities for her future, with the two of us working together. I can see she's ready to explore moving forward and while I certainly don't have a magic wand and I never tell anyone what they should do, I believe that I can provide the support, encouragement, experience and guidance that will help her to unlock the wisdom within herself to live the calmer, happier life she truly wants.
In a nutshell, that's what coaching is.
If you've been having some realisations of your own, and you'd like to talk about how I could help you to make some shifts to live your life in a way that feels good for you, let's have a chat.
You can book a complimentary phone call with me by clicking here. And you can read more about coaching with me on the rest of that page too.
2020 has been quite the year. Let's make your 2021 memorable for very different reasons.